The Road To Hell Is Carpeted With Gooey, Yummy Sandwiches

For real.

For months now I have embraced the whole foods, mindful eating, focus-on-being-healthy-not-on-losing weight thing. And I've lost 15 pounds, with 10 more to go.

Then I went on vacation and embraced the idea of incorporating... a little indulgence. A teensy snacky-treat in my day. Half a spoonful of ice cream to sate the Ice Cream Monster.

HA!

In one week:

Chicken marsala

Brownies for breakfast

Several mojitos (not for breakfast)

Salt water taffy (a New Jersey specialty)

Butter pecan ice cream

French fries

White pasta and lots of it (it's cultural. They made me.) In fact, this whoooole Greek Chicken and pasta dish is compliments of Peter's Diner somewhere in South Jersey. It is large enough to be controlled by the moon and, presumably, would slosh over the sides at high tide.

Regular stinkycheesers are thinking, "But you just got that ginormous windfall of farm-fresh veggies! THAT must have gotten you back on track."

You would think so, right? And to his credit, Sweetie did make homemade tomato soup that was virtuously fresh and packed with lycopene and all that.

But what goes with tomato soup? GRILLED CHEESE. And now I'm hooked on sourdough and melty cheddar. Re-hooked, actually. Relapsed. Mmmmm, cheese....

Ellie Krieger's Sweet and Spicy Grilled Cheese

2 tsp canola oil

1 red onion, finely diced

3 oz sharp Cheddar, thinly sliced, divided

8 slices of whole-wheat bread (although sourdough really, really makes a grilled cheese)

3 oz pepper-jack cheese, thinly sliced, divided

1 large or 2 medium tomatoes, thinly sliced

Heat oil in a nonstick skillet over medium-high heat. Lower heat to medium; add onions and saute, stirring, until edges are brown. Season with salt and pepper to taste.

Place 3/4 oz. Cheddar on one slice of bread. Spread 1 TBSP carmelized onions on top of cheese, then top with 3/4 oz. pepperjack. Top with 1 or 2 slices of tomato, then another slice of bread. Repeat with 3 other sandwiches.

Spray a nonstick skillet with cooking spray and heat until hot. Flip when browned on the bottom (you knew that already).

So You Think You Can't Cook

Now that "So You Think You Can Dance" and "The Biggest Loser" exist in my world, I'm going to have to drop my whole snotty "I don't watch television" thing. Because I do. Pathetically, I try to be home to wave the rabbit ears and that stupid digital TV converter on my 19-inch TV (color, thankyouverymuch) for either of those shows.

I always tune in to SYTYCD around Episode 4, after all the annoying audition footage - you know, where the white Rasta guy calls his dance genre "classical jazz with a touch of hackysack" and then alternates between stylized hopscotch and snow angels (sans snow).

If you haven't seen it - young dancers are randomly paired and assigned a dance genre and choreographer. This is about as "random" as being tapped for a Presidential cabinet post. The dancers practice cute while they're being filmed, then they perform for the judges and America and the voting begins. To the best of my knowledge felons and immigrants are permitted to dial-in for their favorite.

So in honor of showbiz, a ham sandwich with a fancy French accent.

Croque Monsieur
Cooking Light

4 1 1/2-ounce slices French bread
4 teaspoons honey mustard
6 ounces reduced-fat deli ham, thinly sliced
4 1-ounce slices reduced-fat Swiss, cheddar, or fresh Parmesan cheese
1/2 cup fat-free milk
3 large egg whites
Cooking spray

1. Cut a slit in each bread slice to form a pocket. Spread 1 teaspoon honey mustard into each bread pocket. Divide ham and cheese evenly among bread pockets.

2. Combine milk and egg whites in a shallow bowl, stirring with a whisk or fork. Dip sandwiches, 1 at a time, in a milk mixture, turning to coat.

3. Heat a large nonstick skillet coated with cooking spray over medium-high heat. Add 2 sandwiches, cook 3 minutes on each side or until golden brown. Repeat procedure with remaining sandwiches.

Sloppy Joes

A perfectly ripe peach, an iced tea, and a freshly bathed dog at my feet on a gorgeous Sunday morning. Life is good, good, good.

These Sloppy Joes are a great casual lunch or dinner, and the meat freezes well. Since we have a two-person household we like to freeze in dinner-for-two sizes.

If you're watching your carbs or calories, or just want a less-sloppy Joe, try hollowing out the roll before putting in the meat filling. This is especially helpful if you're feeding kids who haven't fully mastered clean eating [true story - when Cutie and I were making cheese dip she spilled a little mustard on her shirt. She noted that it clashed with the blueberry stain she'd acquired earlier in the day but couldn't care less about staining the shirt.]

Good side dishes include french fries, green salad, or corn on the cob.

Sloppy Joes
Everyday Food - I think it was 2005

1 and 1/4 pounds ground meat (beef, beef chuck, bison, chicken, turkey, pork, whatever). And you can go up to 1.4 pounds or down to 1.1ish with no adverse effects on the recipe
1 onion, finely chopped
2 garlic cloves, minced
1 can (14.5 ounces) tomato puree or tomato sauce
2 tablespoons light-brown sugar
1 tablespoon vinegar - cider vinegar is preferred, but plain white vinegar is fine. Fancy fruit-flavored, herb-infused vinegars won't work here.
1 tablespoon tomato paste
1 teaspoon Worcestershire sauce - check the label to see if it's gluten-free, if that's a concern
4 hamburger rolls or hoagie rolls

Optional
1 tablespoon chopped fresh cilantro
1 tablespoon chopped pickled jalapeno chiles
1/2 ripe avocado, thinly sliced


1. Remove the papery outer skin of the onion, chop off the pointy ends, and dice the onion.

2. Remove the papery outer skin of the garlic cloves and either chop with a knife or smoosh through a garlic press.

3. In a small bowl combine the tomato puree/sauce, light-brown sugar, vinegar, tomato pate, and Worcestershire sauce. Stir with a spoon or fork and set aside. If you stir with a rubber spatula, then you can scrape all the sauce out of the bowl easily.

4. Spray a large skillet with nonstick cooking spray. Over medium-high heat (5 on an electric stovetop) cook ground meat, breaking apart pieces with a wooden spoon, until lightly browned. This will take about 5 minutes. [Note: If you are using non-stick cookware just cook until the meat is no longer pink. Food doesn't brown as well or as much in non-stick as it does with other cookware]

3. If you're handy with a hot skillet, drain the fat by pouring it out. If you're not comfortable with that there's an alternative method - get a large spoon and four or five paper towels. Push all the meat to one side of the skillet. Tilt the skillet slightly, lifting up the side that has all the meat in it.

4. The fat should start to collect in the other side of the skillet. Spoon out the fat and wipe out the rest with the paper towels.

5. Redistribute the meat evenly over the pan. Add salt and peper to taste - two or three shakes of each. Add the chopped onion and smooshed garlic. Cook, stirring every so often, for about five minutes or until the onions are no longer solid white.

6. Add the tomato/Worcestershire/vinegar/sugar mix to the skillet. Also add 1 1/2 cups of water. Stir to coat the meat with the sauce.

7. Reduce heat to medium-low (3ish on an electric stovetop). Simmer until thickened, about twenty minutes.

8. IF you're using the optional garnishes, stir in the cilantro and jalapenos. THOROUGHLY WASH YOUR HANDS after handling the jalapenos.

9. Split the hoagie rolls, top with meat and - if you wish - an avocado slice.

Enjoy an easy dinner on a holiday weekend!

Independence Day - Just Brilliant

"I'll bet what motivated the British to colonize so much of the world is that they were just looking for a decent meal." ~Martha Harrison

That's amazing insight. The 3-hour final in the "US History 1600 - 1864" class I took in college was to write six or seven blue books to "Discuss the significance of water in American history, 1600 - 1864." This Martha Harrison would've kicked that exam's butt, no question.

Sweetie and I spent the 4th dining at the fancy-schmancy Woodfire Grill with the smartest woman we know, who has devoted her life to developing, testing, and producing an AIDS vaccine (and raising her kids, at which she did a bang-up job). She's great company, which has been the uncompromising hallmark of our holiday celebrations. Woodfire's barbecue was just unbelievable, and the peach-blueberry crisp finished off the meal perfectly. Munching on watermelon with our favorite 7-year-old and her dad (while watching fireworks) rounded out the evening culinarily. And yes, perfectly ripe watermelon fresh off the vine does count as a culinary experience and is in a different class altogether from the pale pink styrofoam cubes found in the supermarket.

The watermelon was a gift. A southwest Georgia farmer with a disability makes a trip to Atlanta every so often, calls our agency and brings us a feast of whatever he just harvested - "I have 75 pounds of peanuts for y'all!" On Thursday, it was 20 watermelons. After taking the train for a while you might think you've pretty much seen humanity-in-transit in all its wonders and varieties. Try taking the train with a 12-pound watermelon in your arms and see if "weird" doesn't go to a whole new level. It does get you a seat, though.

In all seriousness, it's this country for which Rosellina, Giulio, Tressa, and Dominick - my paternal great-grandparents - set arduous sail in the late 1800's and early 1900's. They each wanted a life in which they, and their future children, could succeed without any imposed limits. They farmed, they owned businesses, they openly went to Mass (Catholic church service) and made pizzelles (anise-flavored cookies) at Christmas and they proudly called themselves Americans. It was in the British colony of "America" that my mother's ancestors arrived in the 1600's... to farm, mine coal and own businesses, and to openly go to church and raise their children as they saw fit. And get a decent meal.

In honor of our fireworks-watching, watermelon-seed-spittin', Peachtree-Road-Race-running-or-wheeling, anthem-singing holiday, I offer the most all-American recipes I have that aren't apple pie:

Confetti Burgers
(Weight Watchers, but don't let that throw you - they don't taste diet-y and they're easily the best of a dozen turkey burger recipes that I've tried. That's right, I labored over a hot grill so you don't have to. Some people rid the world of transmissible diseases and I test out recipes. We all have our gifts and none of us got to choose them.)

3/4 pound ground skinless turkey
1/2 yellow squash, finely shredded (I have one grater with one size hole that I use for everything except zest. Whatever size you have is fine.)
1/2 cup cooked whole-grain brown rice
4 sun-dried tomato halves (not packed in oil), diced
1 tsp Italian herb blend (just combine some oregano, basil, and rosemary)
freshly ground black pepper

1. Preheat the grill to medium-high or prepare a medium-hot fire.
2. Combine the turkey, squash, rice, sun-dried tomatoes, herb blend, and pepper in a bowl, tossing just until mixed. Form the mixture into 4 (3/4-inch-thick) patties.

Either grill or freeze at this point. I usually double the recipe, wrap each uncooked burger in Saran wrap, and throw all the wrapped burgers into a freezer bag. It makes an easy dinner along with a salad.

Boneless Buffalo Wings
from Eating Well magazine
3 TBSP nonfat buttermilk
3 TBSP hot pepper sauce, such as Frank's Red Hot, divided
3 TBSP distilled white vinegar, divided
2 pounds chicken tenders
6 TBSP whole-wheat flour
6 TBSP cornmeal
1/2 tsp cayenne pepper
2 TBSP canola oil, divided 2 cups peeled carrot sticks
2 cups celery sticks
Stinky Cheese Dip (you're on your own for that part)

1. Whisk buttermilk, 2 TBSP hot pepper sauce and 2 TBSP vinegar in a large bowl until combined. Add chicken, toss to coat. Transfer to the refrigerator and let marinate for at least 10 minutes or up to 1 hour, stirring occasionally.
2. Meanwhile, whisk flour and cornmeal in a shallow dish. Whisk the remaining 1 TBSP hot sauce and 1 TBSP vinegar in a small bowl.
3. Remove the chicken from the marinade and roll in the flour mixture until evenly coated. (Discard remaining marinade and flour mixture.) Sprinkle both sides of the chicken with cayenne.
4. Heat 1 TBSP oil in a large nonstick skillet over medium-high heat. Add half the chicken, placing each in a little oil. Cook until golden brown and cooked through, 3 to 4 minutes per side. Transfer to a serving platter. Repeat with the remaining 1 TBSP oil and chicken, reducing the heat if necessary. [Note: make sure you wipe any browned bits out of the skillet; they'll burn and smoke otherwise. From what I've heard....] Transfer to the platter. Drizzle the chicken with the reserved hot sauce mixture. Serve with carrots, celery, and Spicy Stinky Cheese Dip.